Don't Wanna Lose You Now
by JupiterHalo
Summary: Okay everyone! This is a Hotohori and Miaka fic sort of. In it, Hotohori thinks about Miaka after she, Chichiri and Tasuki come back from Kutou. In this story, Tamahome has eaten the kudoku, thus becoming evil.


Hello everyone! It's been a while, I know. But school and a bunch of other stuff have kept me busy. This is a fanfic about Hotohori. This takes place right after Miaka, Tasuki and Chichiri come back from Kutou after trying to save Tamahome, who is now under the influence of the kodoku. Got it? Good! The song I'm using is called "Don't Wanna Lose You Now" by the Backstreet Boys, and that belongs to them. As always, please e-mail me at SetsunaPuu21@cs.com with any useful suggestions! Enjoy!  
  
"Love is an attempt to change a piece of a dream world into reality." ~Theodor Reik  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own "Fushigi Yuugi" or "Don't Wanna Lose You Now". I am only borrowing them for the sake of this fanfic.  
  
Title: "Don't Wanna Lose You Now"  
Author: JupiterHalo  
Part: 1/1  
Date finished: November 16, 2002  
Rating: G  
  
"..." means talking  
'...' means thinking   
**********************************************  
(Flashback):  
"Goodbye! Goodbye, Tamahome!" Miaka cried, tears flowing freely down her face as she, Tasuki and Chichiri returned safely to the palace in Konan.  
**********************************************  
I never thought that I would lose my mind  
That I could control this  
  
Miaka ran sobbing into the arms of a *very* startled Hotohori. "Mi-?"   
"Bye... I said bye to Tamahome." Miaka managed to get out through her sobs.  
  
Never thought that I'd be left behind  
That I was stronger than you, baby  
  
Hotohori hugged her tightly, closing his eyes in pain; the very pain Miaka was feeling. 'How could Tamahome do this?'   
"We had better get her to her room." Nuriko said. Hotohori nodded, then proceeded to take her there himself, trying his best to comfort her.  
  
Girl if only I knew what I've done  
You know, so why don't you tell me   
  
After Miaka had fallen asleep, Hotohori called a meeting with the remaining seishi.   
"Chichiri, what happened in Kutou?" he asked in a deadly calm voice.  
"I have no idea," Chichiri replied. "It seems that Tamahome is under the influence of very powerful magic. So powerful, that it's made him lose his memory." He sighed softly. "It may be so powerful that we may never be able to break its hold on Tamahome."  
Hotohori was shocked to hear that, but also, deep in his heart, was also a bit glad. Because now that Tamahome was gone, he may have a chance to win Miaka's heart.  
  
And I, I would bring down the moon and the sun  
To show how much I care  
  
Hotohori nodded, then said: "We must take great care in our actions. It is necessary to summon Suzaku as quickly as possible, so that there may be a slight chance of peace in our world."   
Everyone at the table nodded, but Chiriko looked down and started fiddling with his flute.   
"All right, everyone should get some rest while they can. It's been a long night, and we will need our strength." Hotohori ended the meeting with "May Suzaku protect us all."  
  
Don't wanna lose you now  
Baby, I know we can win this  
Don't wanna lose you now  
No no, or ever again  
  
Everyone left the room, except for Chichiri. "Heika, are you all right?"   
"Yes. I'll be fine. I'm worried about Miaka, though. She is very traumatized over what has happened."  
Chichiri nodded. "As we all are." He glanced at Hotohori, who was still seated in his chair. "Heika, may I ask you a question?"  
"Please feel free to ask me for anything."  
Chichiri took a breath, then asked, "Do you still love Miaka?"  
  
I've got this feeling you're not gonna stay  
It's burning within me  
  
Hotohori smiled a little. "Yes. With all of my being." He sighed. "I would bring down the moon and the sun to show how much I care for her."  
Chichiri nodded. "With Tamahome gone... she'll need someone to depend on. To give her the encouragement she needs to summon Suzaku."  
"I know. I shall be there all I can."  
  
The fear of losing  
Of slipping away  
It just keeps getting closer, baby  
"And... she may even grow to return your feelings, Heika."  
Hotohori shook his head gently, saying, "No. She will always love Tamahome. She has been slipping away from me, and there is no way I can prevent it."  
  
Whatever reason to leave that I've had  
My place was always beside you  
And I wish that I didn't need you so bad  
Your face just won't go away  
  
He sighed. "But it hurts so much. She has been the reason of my very existence." He finally looked up at Chichiri with a look of utter defeat. "Why can't it be me?"  
  
Don't wanna lose you now  
Baby, I know we can win this  
Don't wanna lose you now  
No no, or ever again  
  
"Fate has a strange way of playing one against another, but it will always be right in the end."   
"Thank you, Chichiri. Now please, don't trouble yourself with me. It's been a very distressing and exhausting night, and you need your sleep."  
Chichiri nodded, and turned to leave the room. "Remember, Heika, you aren't alone anymore." And with that, he left, leaving Hotohori by himself.  
  
I never thought that I would lose my mind  
That I could control this  
  
Hotohori got up and paced around for awhile. 'Chichiri is right,' he thought. 'Even if I'll never be able to convince her to love me, Miaka will still need me to help her through this. I may be hurt, but I can't leave the one I love alone.'  
  
Never thought that I'd be left behind  
That I was stronger than you  
  
He walked down the hall and into her room. Seating himself on the chair next to her bed, he stared at Miaka's face as she slept, fitfully. Every once in a while, she called out for Tamahome, and during those times he squeezed her hand gently.   
  
Don't want to lose to loneliness  
Girl I know we can win  
Don't want to lose to emptiness, oh no  
Never again  
  
As Hotohori found himself trying to stay awake, he realized that he had thought about many things during the night. Even though it was unfair of him to ask her for her love, there was no reason why he should abandon her in this hour of need.   
Tamahome may be gone, but there was still him. And he would give her anything she desired. And she may love him, deep in her heart.   
After all, the sun rises each morning to a brand new day, doesn't it?  
  
Don't wanna lose you now  
Baby, I know we can win this  
Don't wanna lose you now  
No no, or ever again  
**********************************************  
Well, what do you think? This is my first attempt at a songfic, so I apologize if this is really bad. ^.^;;; And please give me feedback at SetsunaPuu21@cs.com! I *really* appreciate it! Peace, everyone!  
  
Love always,  
~JupiterHalo~ 


End file.
